Yes, This is why I love a GOOD Saturday!

What a nice day!!!! Busy, but nice. This morning, the kids went with Mom and Dad to Philadelphia to see the Philadelphia Orchestra perform at the Kimmell Center. Family day, with music from Walt Disney's "Fantasia". They had a nice time!!!! While they were gone, Fred and I made the best of our time together, alone. We really needed it, since things fell apart for awhile. And, so...... we headed to Rice's Flea Market. Since we weren't the "early birds", we found ourselves hurrying through, as the vendors began packing up. It was fun anyway. We had a nice talk on the ride there, which made the fact that we were late, much less important. :)
We didn't buy anything until we were about to leave. Seems I just can't say no to old men trying to sell out their stock of Bagels. They were so cute. And so, We bought bagels. They were happy, and so were we. :) Nice really goes a long way with me :).

When we arrived home, it seemed like our date was soon to be over. We ran out for lunch, and I had a Salad. Gold star for the girl on a mission!

After lunch, we had Mom and Dad stuff to do. Picking up, dropping off... and before we know it - we have one extra child in our group. lol We always entertain extra kids on the weekends that the kids are home. :) This time, it was one of the usual kiddies.... Lindsey!

Off to the Car Dealership. I mention the thought of a new car, Fred's in the Consumer Reports book, checking it out. So, we go over to Reedman's. I test drive this car I've had my eye on.... I LOVE IT! We'll see. I think we're both at the point in our lives where we don't want to make a quick decision. SO, we'll talk about it, and figure out what we want to do.

And then.... we drop the girls off. Going to spend the night at Lindsey's house. Now, it's down to me, Fred and Brandon. Hmmmmmmmmmm..... off to Blockbuster!!! Rent a movie, get some snacks (no bad snacks for me), and off to the Clubhouse to watch it on the movie screen!!!! :) Bad movie, nice time.

Now, time to settle down for the night. Heck, it's after Midnight!!!!! zzzzzzzzzzz

Nice day. Really felt like things were falling back into place.

Cool.

Yeah, Today was all good. :)

Remember this song?

I woke up this morning, and when I looked out the window...... this song was playing in my head. And so, I share it with you!!!! May today bring you nothing but sunshine!!!!!

I Can See Clearly Now

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun shiny day

I think I can make it now, the pain is gone
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I've been prayin' for
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun shiny day

Look all around, there's nothin' but blue skies
Look straight ahead, nothin' but blue skies

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun shiny day

Happy Saturday!!!!

Well, yesterday I could have been described as the month of March.... I went into the day like a lion, and went out like a lamb! I started my day in a bad sort of way. I had troubles a miles high, and conflict with the people I love. Then, during the course of the day, I decided that I was going to be okay. AND, the people that love me, and care for me, well... they'll be there. And the one's that don't - well, they'll just "go away".

So, last night - I had a GREAT time with my kiddie loves. The 3 of us went to the Mall. It was so much fun. They love going out with me. They think I'm a pretty cool Mom. We laugh a lot, and talk about stuff. And, I listen to everything they want to tell me. It was nice..... just nice :)

Then, when we got back, I joined the small going away party for Marie and Brian. It was cool. Fred and I connected. We have had the most difficult time. It's been tough. But, last night was good. We played "Family Feud" with Jim and Dennis, and then he and I played "Scrabble". We both felt drained from all the conflict, and fighting. And, I think we both knew, it was time to start over. With a clean slate.

TODAY: CLEAN SLATE.

Anything for a smile

****** LET THE CHALLENGE BEGIN ******

The EASY part is done!~

Had my first "Weigh In" today.

My goal for week 1 = 3 pounds. Let the challenge begin!!!!!!

Ready, set, go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PICTURE OF THE WEEK!!!!!

Acceptance and surrender
Move us forward on this Journey. Force does not work.
Acceptance and surrender
Two concepts that hurt the most before we do them.

Today I am grateful...

For eyes to see miracles
For ears to hear angels
For hands to create beauty
For feet to carry me along rocky roads
For emotions to feel the human experience
For a mind willing to expand
For a voice to sing God’s praises
For a nose to capture scents
For a soul that will never know death
For a heart that’s breakable and has enough space to soar with love

If the only prayer you said in your life was "thank you," that would suffice. --Meister Eckhart

It's Raining, it's pouring.... Let's Celebrate Anyway!

It's Friday. Friday is my favorite day of the "work week". However, I've been miserable. And, I've been spewing misery.... and THAT IS NOT ME! Even when I feel down, or might be struggling with life, in general... I try to keep on track. Keeps me sane! And, when someone feels happy, with any luck, it spreads.... to others that may not be quite as happy.

So, It's Friday. Break out the Balloons. Celebrate life. Live a little. Smile, don't frown..... Be lifted up, not down.


And for those I may have brought down with me, I do apologize. I'm straightening up in my chair, and putting on my happy face!

Friday The 13th.

Seems to fit in with the theme of my life right now.

Sorry. Late, sleepless night. Unless I have something positive to post, I may be pretty quiet today, here.... on my blog.

Thursday Night....

Tonight was tough. Silent ride home from our first visit to our Therapist....

Communication - not working......

I'm sitting on the bed, writing this, while he's gone off to the shop, or something. I really don't know. He just left. Not easy, not fun. This is how it is for us tonight. This is how it's been, for far too long. I usually follow him. I can't do it anymore. I mean it. I have to stop. And, if something doesn't change, who really knows where this life will lead us.

I don't want to post sad, painful things on this site. But, right now, I cannot do anything else.

There's no fluffy, soft picture to paint tonight.



We're swimming against the tide. It's exhausting.

And off we go!

So, me and the bats.... We're headed off to "University Day" over at Daly's. The trolley will be picking us up at noon. (lol)

I must watch out for my little bats.... make sure they don't trip. climbing up into this thing. Ahhhhhhhhhhh... I have my camera! I'll get a few shots. Post them tonight. They have no idea that I have this Blog site. So, I can post their faces all over... lol - I must entertain myself. Helps me get through the day.

I'll post later. Filling this Blog Spot up!!!!!

If I get it all out, I feel better.

Thursday.

Tonight is HUGE. After being together with my hubby for 8 years, we're stepping forward & seeing a therapist. Her name is Nora. It's scary. It's exciting. It's huge. Two weeks ago, we had a huge blow out. Afterwards, it was important to us both, that we agreed to seek help from an outside source. We made the appointment, and since then, it's been quiet..... and peaceful at home. It's a big step. Opening up.
Funny... Fred and I are so intense. When we connect, we're the most affectionate couple in the world. There's never a moment that we're not holding each other, or touching each other... in some way. BUT, when we have conflict, it's intense - but to the other extreme. It's difficult, and we can't seem to find common ground. We both feel the way we feel, and find it hard to understand the other's point of view. Anyway, the bottom line is - we are seeing someone tonight. AND, I look forward to it very much.

Also, we are together all the time. It's great. If I could choose only one person to spend all of my free time with, it would be him. However, since we spent so many years isolating ourselves from the outside world, we've come to this place in our life where we wish we had more friends. Seems all the friends I have had, are like a snowstorm. They come into my life, bright and pure, and settle in for awhile. Then, as time passes, they begin to fade. And, like snow... one day comes, the sun rises, and they're gone. *Shrugs. SO, maybe we need to join a group, get out there, open our circle up a little more....
We talk about it. He has some great stories. I've heard them all (or at least most of them). I still think they're fun to listen to. I have stories too. He's heard mine 1,000 times. He's very sweet. I can tell him the same thing over and over again - and he listens, like he's never heard it before. BUT, it would be nice to share with other's. Does that make sense? See... look at me know. I can't slow down. Maybe it's the 6 cups of coffee... maybe I have too much to say... in general... who knows.

This is my blog. This is my one place. This is me. My life.

This pretty much explains my day today

CUTE

Preparing for my Big Weight Loss Challenge, beginning this Friday at Noon! I'm pretty excited about it. I'm going to be 100% on it, from Friday the 13th, until July 21st. 14 weeks to a better, more curvy, more fit, sexy BODY!
I will be posting my weight loss EVERY Friday!!!!! I can't wait!!!! And, as soon as I've lost 10 pounds, I'm posting a picture. Sexy, fun, don't know.... just some picture showing my success!

Camping - In Tents

Okay, I'm in!

So, camping isn't meant to be done in cabins, or Yurts... or campers, or trailers. Camping is pitching a tent.... dealing with the discomfort of the ground, or.. trying to sleep on an air mattress.. hoping the air doesn't find it's way out. It's about cooking over a fire, or something like that. Telling ghost stories at night, and holding on to the one's you love, if you get scared. It's about getting back to the basics... or, for the kids, learning what "the basics" are. Using public restrooms, public showers (ohhh... could be exciting) lol.... It's about exploring.... nature.

Baby, I'm in. Bring it on! :)

Just tell me this.... Can I bring my favorite, soft comfy's, and blanket? :)

Let's try it. I haven't camped since I was a little girl. I'm in!!!!! I'm ready!!!!

Wednesday

Wednesday.....

Last night I didn't post. Not sure where the time went, but.. I guess I just wasn't in the mood. Had gone out with the family, for dinner. We also went to see Donna and Michelle, to see how they were doing. Michelle is really doing well. I'm very proud of her. When I first met her, I had no idea what she was like, sober. Now, she's full of positive life. It's nice to see. And, I believe that Steve has helped her a lot in so many ways. He's a good, Christian guy. AND, although he's not the best with words (lol)... he means well. I think he's a good friend for her. A real positive influence in her life. YEAH for Michelle. :) You go, girl.

Went home, relaxed. That's about it.

Today, a mystery.....

Oh, and this hump day picture is for my boy, who simply Loves Camels. :)

Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same.--

My Happy Place...

I'm taking a minute to write a little. I need a break, and this seems to be a good outlet for me. I need a place, where I can just be me. This is it. I can say what I feel, and for some odd reason, once I get it out, even by typing it... I feel a little better. :)

Today has been a little hectic. I have spent some time (this morning) feeling sorry for myself. Then, after I went to see Brooke, my spirits were lifted, and I felt better. Now, I am just relaxing for a minute....


Sunflowers. The one and only flower that I have ever grown. In fact, I grew a small bundle of them. And, I have the worst luck with gardening.. No green thumb here.
However, when I lived in Missouri, I grew some Sunflowers. Who cares, right? Well, I did. I had so much negativity in my life, that I wanted to take time to create something, plant something, so I could feel good, positive... Sunflowers. I was the talk of the neighborhood. I had people stopping all the time, to tell me how beautiful the flowers were. And, they were. And, I felt so good. Such positive energy.... from silly, big, blooming flowers. Soon after they had completely grown, I learned that I would be moving. I was thrilled, and yet, silly as it sounds, I was going to miss those flowers. My neighbor wanted them. I told him they couldn't be moved, or they would die. He insisted, as I needed to clear the flower beds anyway(according to the rules of the base). He took them, and carefully planted them. During the next few days, I watched them droop. They weren't facing the sun, so they didn't make it. :(

But, here's the thing. I did it. I took seeds, planted them, and watched them grow.
To some, no big deal. To me, Huge deal. And it brought me to a happy place.

We can do anything, if we set our minds to it. I have to remember that. I've been so busy telling myself that I can't do it.... and lost the whole Sunflower concept. I have to reset my mind, and remember, I can do anything, if I really want to. No apologies for rambling. THIS is my blogspot. I can ramble all I want!

Whew! What a Day it's been Already!

I think this is a test.. testing, 123.... testing...

My Night sucked, last night -
My morning Sucked. Fist time I overslept in forever....

Then, I arrive at work safely. THAT was nice.

And then - BOOM! My phone rings. I see that it's Brooke's school. Ut-oh. She, by far - is my Drama Baby. SO, I figure she needs something. (lol) Of course she does! The poor baby has torn her favorite jeans, IN THE CROTCH!!! So, I have to take a VERY early lunch, and travel back to PA to save my munchkin, who sits patiently, waiting for Mommy to save the day. So, I arrive at the School, sign in, and go directly to the Nurses Office. We hurry into the Bathroom, and she begins to cry. I felt it. I wanted to cry with her. She's having a bad day, too. I totally get it. I relate to her so well. SO, I hug her, and make her laugh. I do what I can to turn it around, and I did it. She started by wanting to go home. She was upset and embarrassed that the kids knew she tore her jeans. I told her it would be okay, and I played with her hair, told her she was beautiful, and blew her face dry. We both laughed, right there, in the bathroom. She was good as new. And, it made the whole trip worth it. Little did she know, I needed that hug at least as much as she did. NOW, I feel a lot better. And I think she does, too.

Tuesday Morning

I had a rough night's sleep last night. At 3 a.m. , I was wide awake. Going over my life, in my head. Trying to figure things out, that really don't need to be figured out at 3 a.m. My head was so full of thoughts, and I couldn't make them go away. Apparently, somehow, I feel back to sleep. When my alarm clock went off this morning, I shut it off. Or something.... And, next thing I know, it's 7:00 a.m. One hour later than my usual wake up time. NO coffee in bed... no wake up time with the news... I jumped out of bed & right into the shower... NOT a fun way to start my day. Everything was so rushed. And, of course, Brandon was late because of me being late. Drill Seargent Mommy kicked in, and we all made it on time! *Whew! Of course I had to drive him to school. That, I don't mind :).

I hope today is a good day. It's not been the best morning...... *Sigh

Monday Evening

Brooke is home. I'm glad about that. She's actually right next to me on the couch. She's fallen asleep. It was a very busy weekend for her. When I pulled in the driveway, she came running out of Lisa's house. She was thrilled to see me. I felt the same about seeing her. As always, when I'm apart from the kids for a few days, they always come home looking a little bit older. More grown up, than when they left. I can't believe how quickly they're growing.

When we got in, I made dinner for the kids. I wasn't in the mood to eat. I still felt a little full from lunch. Fred wasn't home. He was in the shop, having a few drinks with his other wife, Jim. :P

I had all these plans to walk, go to the gym, go to Yoga class... but all of the sudden, I felt really sick to my stomach (again). Sometimes I think it's my nerves, sometimes I don't know. I worry a lot about things. Now, I'm just trying to relax. I'm just not feeling so well, physically.

The kids are back to school tomorrow. It seems like they've been off forever.

I'm not so much in the mood to write anymore tonight. It's a blue Monday evening.... I hope to get to bed nice and early. I look forward to a bright, beautiful day, tomorrow.

Good Night.

Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.
Henry David Thoreau

Monday

Here we are again! A new beginning, to a new week! I feel well rested, and ready to take on the 'bats'. (lol)

What a nice weekend it was!!! I had a nice time with the family. I only wish that my hubby felt better. He was feeling down. I think every Holiday season, he feels sad. I guess a lot of it has to do with his childhood. Even if he doesn't realize it, I can see it in him. So, I always do my best to make it nice for him. :)

Mom and Dad came for Dinner last night. Fred made a wonderful Dinner! Me, well... I made a great treat! Strawberry Daiquiri's! YUM!!! I think that was only about the 2nd time in my life that I had an alcoholic drink in front of my parents. (LOL) Weird..... I am 39! It was nice though. :)

I got a beautiful Silver Charm Bracelet for Easter. :) Now I can start my own bracelet of memories. :) I'm very excited about that. I can't wait to search for charms now. Fun stuff!!!!!

Oops! Line of Students!!!!

Fun for the day ~

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter!


If you are reading this, you must know one thing. You are a very special person in my life. I have only shared this blogspot with a small amount of people. So, if you are one of them, know - you are loved!


On this Easter Sunday, I did my usual Sunday morning "Postsecret" in bed... with my coffee. I really enjoy that.
While Fred was getting coffee, I hurried out of bed and grabbed his little basket. I stuck it on his side of the bed. :) With a card. I think he liked it. :)

It's funny.... Brooke is away, and Brandon is sleeping. He also has Justin over. And, even though things aren't like they were when the kids were little, and believed in the Easter Bunny, I still feel excited to see them look for eggs, and find their baskets waiting for them. Brooke called me this morning. She had just finished looking for eggs at Lisa's, and she seemed to have had a lot of fun. Lisa even hid a basket for her. I appreciate that she was so sweet, and treats Brooke so special. Now, they're off to Church. I hope they have a great day.

Fred woke Brandon up. Wanted to see if he was ready to look for eggs.... he wasn't (lol). See, a huge sign that he's growing up. *sigh. Well, instead, I've been running all over the place chasing the cats. Seems they've found some of the plastic eggs that are filled with coins. (lol) I've got one cat rolling the egg down the stairs, and the other one busting an egg open, leaving change all over the floor. Never a dull moment.

Well, this has been my morning so far - and it's only 10 a.m. :)

The rest of the day is a celebration. And, I'll post more tonight.

Saturday in Philadelphia With the Guys!

Well!!! Today was a very fun day!!! I had the pleasure of going into Philadelphia with Fred, Brandon, and Justin. A day out with the guys!!!! We went in to see the Mutter Museum. It's a very strange, yet highly educational Museum that was created, and owned by the Philadelphia College for Physicians. It was Bizarre!!! Most of the stuff in there was real!!! Ewwwwwwwwww.....LMAO @ me when we were out to eat and I asked Fred what the Fetus's in a bottle were made of... (Wax?) No!!!!!!!!!!! They were REAL. It was weird. I had just finished telling Brandon and Justin that most of the things in there were real. I guess it was just so hard to believe. Well, to make a long story short (YES, even I can do that once in awhile... it was pretty cool. :)

After that, we went to the Spaghetti Warehouse. That place is so neat. I think the boys really enjoyed it. They played Video games, and really had a nice time. The food was Okay, but the atmosphere was really cool & Nice.

Now, we're home. We ran out to the Grocery Store to grab some stuff for Dinner tomorrow. I look forward to having my parents over. I do miss Brooke though. :(

PICTURE OF THE WEEK!

I know. This is not the most creative picture of the week. BUT, it does represent this time of year, in celebration of Easter. Also, my family and I have always hand painted Easter eggs. The past two years, we did not. However, we will resume with our tradition, next year. We all agreed that we missed doing it, and don't want to give up on something as special as that. So, this picture of the week makes me smile. It means a lot.

Well, here we are!!! Me and my Boo Boo, out to lunch. I'm still not feeling very well. Not sure this was the best choice (But, I let Brandon choose). We went to "Cheeburger Cheeburger". It's a cute, 50's style Restaurant. Milk Shakes, etc.... fun! Now, we're home.... and I'm trying to relax a bit.